mpreg

I»m really glad that anon brought up MajorStars – I was able to read up on both it and LittleStars! So good! I can’t help but wonder how Anakin will react to being approached by Qui-Gon, especially because if he accepts (and considering he’s smart enough to have deduced who his parents are, I imagine he might indeed accept), it will put him in the middle of the Council’s scrutiny and Anakin may be unnerved by it!

Posted on av swmoddy

Looking around the room with wide eyes, Anakin hands twitched with the urge to rub against every surface to see if he could pick up anything from the one that had owned it before. If any of the furniture had soaked in the presence of the person that had used them.

Of Obi-Wan.

His bearer.

Of course, Anakin wasn’t suppose to know that and he knew that while the council had been reluctant, they had allowed Qui-Gon to take him on. After all, if they had rejected it, everyone would wonder why.

Anakin would wonder why, would be curious as they had to give a reason.

They clearly couldn’t find a good enough reason to deny the apprenticeship outside of the fact that Qui-Gon was his father and once more, they didn’t want to advertise that.

Which meant that Anakin was now officially Qui-Gon Jinn’s padawan, brother padawan to Obi-Wan Kenobi.

‘So wizard!’ Anakin gave into his urges and rubbed his hands on the dresser, squeaking happily when what he could only describe as warmth echoed back at him, Obi-Wan’s signature resonating in the old furniture.

It could only be Obi-Wan’s, this was his old room after all, everything in this room had been touched and lived in with this person and now this room was Anakin’s space.

Anakin got to live where his bearer had once been, could soak in his signature.

If there was ever a moment Anakin envied Jedi like knight Vos for having psychometry, it was right now.

The walls could literally talk to them and would tell him stories if only Anakin had the ability. ‘But at least I can feel him…’ Anakin turned his attention on the desk, approaching it slowly as something on it caught his attention.

There was a ship about the size of Anakin’s hand on the desk, resting on a little black platform.

Hand carved from some kind of substance.

Duraplast maybe?

Anakin recognized it as a eta-2 actis-class interceptor, his favorite ship.

Picking it up from its platform with ease, Anakin almost whined as he felt Obi-Wan once more, his signature soaked into every piece of the ship. His bearer had spent time on this, carefully wielding it, carving it and painting it with meticulous care to details and Anakin couldn’t spot a single error or a miss painted paint line.

Just a beautifully carved toy in yellow, gray and black, covered in a glossy finish to protect its paints and detail.

Obi-Wan had left it behind.

Everything but the furniture had been cleared out.

The furniture…and this.

That meant that Obi-Wan had left it on purpose for Anakin.

Swallowing thickly at that, Anakin pressed the ship to his chest, holding it tightly. This had been made for him, by his bearer, Obi-Wan knew Anakin enough to guess his favorite ship or at least knew that Anakin was a mech-head.

He had spent time making what could be a toy or a decoration for Anakin with his own hands, to the point his own Force signature had sunk into the very foundation of the toy.

Carefully, Anakin placed it back down, rubbing furiously at his face with his hands, wiping away the tears, being overwhelmed from the shock of what he found.

Evidence beyond his parents showing up at lessons and sparring tournament, evidence that they cared and knew him as best they could even while not trying to be obvious.

“Are you alright padawan?” Qui-Gon called out, his tone low and Anakin had to take a deep breath before he could answer.

Turning around, he gave a bright smile to the concerned master standing in the doorway of his room. “Better than ever master. I just found this wizard interceptor!” He chirped, gesturing to it.

If Qui-Gon noticed that his eyes were slightly red and his voice was slightly squeaky, the man didn’t say anything, his face shifting into a softer smile. “Obi-Wan made it, a welcome to the lineage present. You like it then?” He inquired warmly.

“I love it.” Anakin beamed as he took a step forward and threw his arms around Qui-Gon’s waist in a tight hug, hoping he’d see Obi-Wan soon to hug him too. Qui-Gon’s large, warm hands came up, gently patting Anakin’s head as the man gave a soft, rumbling laugh.

In hoarder deer did obi wan feel uneasy about the food because he is possibly going in to labour soon? Or something else? Also love everything you do and can’t wait for updates on any of your amazing fics

Posted on av swmoddy

Fiddling with his fork, Obi-Wan eyed the tray across his lap with a reluctance that even surprised himself, half wondering if it was the sterile environment of the med clinic that was causing his lack of appetite.

His pregnancy had all but cured him of his occasional forgetfulness or pickiness when it came to food while in civilized places, his body demanding what it wanted and honestly not rejecting much. Not even Anakin’s peculiar bug stew that normally only Yoda, Yaddle and a few of the avian Jedi at the temple were a fan of.

Qui-Gon had looked rightly horrified when Obi-Wan finished of the pot on his own, while Anakin looked faintly worried the stew might not be the best for the fetuses and had insisted Obi-Wan go to the healers to get checked.

But right now…

He didn’t want to eat.

And yet he knew he couldn’t get away from it either despite setting his fork down on the tray.

Cody was watching him after all, slowly munching on his own food and yet even Cody’s plate sent a spike of unease through Obi-Wan as he sent his lover a faint smile while tugging his the warm cardigan Qui-Gon had gotten him closed in the front, feeling slightly chilled.

Was it a repeat of the morning sickness?

He had a brief but violent affair with that and had concerned those closest to him even as the healers assured them that violent morning sickness could be common in some baseline humans.

It didn’t feel like it was that though, his body didn’t feel like it was rejecting the sight or smell of food.

Instead it was just an uneasy feeling instead.

“Aren’t you hungry?” Cody questioned suddenly, setting his plate aside on the foot of Obi-Wan’s bed as he shifted closer to to his Jedi, a concerned frown on his face. “Do you want me to go find something else for you?” He questioned, resting his hand on Obi-Wan’s knee.

The obvious worry for him had Obi-Wan smiling despite his unease, reaching down to cover Cody’s hand in turn. “No, no that’s fine. I can just comm Qui-Gon and he can bring some of that prenatal vitamin powder healers prescribed me. I’ll just have a shake of that.” He settled on.

Maybe he was just uneasy at the prospect of chewing, he’d been on a mostly liquid diet since he woke up.

Cody didn’t look happy with that answer but didn’t object, only squeezed Obi-Wan’s knee. “Alright riduur, as long as you get some nourishment.” He agreed quietly, reaching up to rub at his own chest.

Actually…

Cody looked pale, the darkened skin having gained an ashy color that had Obi-Wan narrowing his eyes. “…Cody, are you alright?” He inquired slowly, shuffling the tray off his lap to the narrow table beside the bed.

“Mmn, indigestion or heartburn I’d wager,” Cody sighed, giving Obi-Wan a small smile before grunting, sitting down heavily. “Or… maybe not. Kark, what is…” He hissed quietly, his eyes watering as he gripped at his chest.

The tray hit the floor, scattering plate and food all over the as Obi-Wan struggled to his feet, the Force giving a keening warning in his ears. “Cody!” Obi-Wan reached to his lover as Cody hissed in pain, bunching the chest of his officer coat in his fist.

Acting on instincts, Obi-Wan pulled the little bottle of antidote he had been bid to store in his pockets by the Force, tipping Cody’s head back with one hand on his chin and the other holding the bottle to force him to swallow it, staring at Cody’s watering eyes as the tears finally slid down the others eyes.

There was blood mixed in them and Obi-Wan out a deeply distressed whine as the door of his room slammed open, Qui-Gon standing there with his unlit saber in hand and Wooley right behind him with his blaster in his hands. “Obi-Wan!”

Distressed, Obi-Wan looked up just long enough to catch the others eyes. “Poison.” He nodded to the food on the floor before focusing back on Cody, ensuring he got every little drop of the antidote down as he rubbed at the others throat, ensuring Cody swallowed.

He distantly recognized Qui-Gon moving past him, Wooley talking into his comms and medics gathering at the door but Obi-Wan’s focus was on Cody, focusing on the other with his Force, feeling how the antidote was spreading.

And even more distantly than that was a thought floating in his mind. ‘Someone tried to poison me and succeeded poisoning Cody…’

Someone tried to kill them again.

Secretwecarry: so I don’t know about Obi-Wan but I would have wanted a shower if I was him

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Clinging onto Anakin’s shoulders as the other held onto his elbows, Obi-Wan let out a heavy breath through his nose as he struggled to remain upright on trembling legs.

‘It feels like I haven’t walked in months. It hasn’t been that long, Helix even had me up and walking daily with the IV pole…’ He breathed out against Anakin’s shoulder, slowly shifting back to put his full weight on his legs instead of on Anakin. He gave the other a bland smile, Anakin answering with a worried one in return.

But he didn’t let go of Obi-Wan, shifting around until he could wrap his arm around the others waist in a supporting motion. “So, fresher?” He murmured.

Nodding, Obi-Wan started slowly shuffling towards the fresher. “I really need a shower,” Obi-Wan murmured, the feeling of Anakin’s warmth against his side somehow soothing instead of invasive. “I feel… so filthy.” He swallowed.

He didn’t want to admit that some of that filthy feeling was most likely a purely psychological feeling but at the same time, he really did want a shower. Helix would have cleaned him up after everything went down but Obi-Wan wanted, no, needed a shower.

And Anakin must have sensed that as he continued moving to the fresher with Obi-Wan. “Do you need help in there? I mean, you’re not quite steady.” He murmured with an uneasy expression.

“Helix left a shower chair in there,” Obi-Wan assured his former padawan, chuckling faintly when Anakin relaxed. “Worried I’d knock myself out?” He teased faintly.

That gained him a small snort. “Rather worried about you cracking your head open if I’m honest.” Anakin noted in an airy tone.

Really though, Obi-Wan had been managing with Helix touching him but he wasn’t sure how he’d handle anyone else touching him intimately as he was sure Anakin was going to offer to wash his back or help him in the shower if the shower chair wasn’t there.

No, the idea of anyone actually touching him made him feel nauseous and as much as he was almost terrified of touching himself, he wanted to be clean.

Which made him glance down at his clothes. “…Could you do me a favor Anakin?” He stated softly as they paused in front of the fresher door, Anakin reaching out to tap the button to open the door.

“Hmm? Oh, yeah, course.” Anakin perked up, the two shuffling inside to the bench of the fresher.

One side was for the toilet stalls and the other had shower stalls, Obi-Wan spotting the shower chair Helix had spoken about peeking out of one of them. “Could you go fetch clean clothes from my room, sleeping clothes?” He specified, glancing up at the taller man.

Anakin paused before carefully helping Obi-Wan sit down on the bench in the minor room between the shower section and the toilet section, Obi-Wan slipping his feet out of the slippers. “You sure? I mean about being alone in here?” When Obi-Wan nodded, giving Anakin a beseeching look, the other gave in. “Okay, just let me find you a towel and I’ll head to your quarters.” He moved to the cupboard with all of the harshly cleaned towels of the ship.

But they were better than nothing.

Slowly, he started to struggle his way out of his clothes though he slowed down as uncertainty over his body crept in. He didn’t want the other to see him even without a shirt, too aware of the pudge of his stomach and what was missing.

Towel in hand, the other came back to the bench, depositing with an easy smile even as Anakin visibly dawdled before sighing and resting his hand on Obi-Wan’s shoulder. “Ten minutes Obi-Wan. I’ll be back in ten.” He promised quietly.

“Ten minutes,” Obi-Wan agreed, hesitating and then patting the bench. “But you’ll stay here when you come back, right?” He questioned quietly, looking away shamefully when Anakin’s eyes flashed with sadness.

“Yeah, I’ll sit down on the bench. Keep your clothes dry.” Anakin tried chirping, his hand lingering on Obi-Wan’s shoulder until he forced himself to go, the door hissing open for him and then closing with a quiet swish.

Finally alone for the first time in days, Obi-Wan let out a shuddering breath and continued undressing, dropping his shirt on the bench, followed by underwear and pants.

It was all medbay standard so it be going into the hamper.

Nude, the air made goosebumps rise on his skin and Obi-Wan shivered as he threw the towel over his shoulder to keep his hands free, mentally and physically preparing himself to get up.

Obi-Wan let out another shuddering breath before forcing himself to his feet. His legs trembled beneath him and for a fearful moment, Obi-Wan thought he’d all over as a woozy spell hit him.

Thankfully, he didn’t, instead he managed to slowly shuffle his way to the closest stall, grabbing onto the wall.

‘…One step at a time.’ Obi-Wan reminded himself, swallowing thickly as he slowly made his way to the shower stall with the shower chair, his legs trembling the entire way.

SecretWeCarry- let Obi-wan have a goddamn hug where nothing goes wrong, you absolute monster

Posted on av swmoddy

Opening his eyes slowly, Obi-Wan simply stared at the white ceiling for long minutes without a conscious or coherent thought passing through his mind, the only sounds being the quiet and steady beep of the machine monitoring his heart rate.

As he laid there, he became aware of a few things.

One, he felt dreadful, his entire body a point of discomfort and filth. Two, he was somewhat floaty at the same time that indicated he was hella high on painkillers and three, the entire room was dimmed down, indicating that it was most likely night time and four… someone was holding his hand.

Someone very familiar.

Turning his head slowly, his body feeling sluggish and horrible, he peered at the person holding his hand.

Anakin.

Anakin was holding the hand without the Iv attached, watching him with a fatigued look on his face.

Seeing he had Obi-Wan’s attention, Anakin raised the other Jedi’s hand and rested it to his cheek, pressing it down carefully against the warmth.

It was comforting, the feel of warm skin beneath his palm and Obi-Wan stroked his thumb slowly under Anakin’s eye, squinting faintly at the dark smudges beneath them. “…When was the last time you slept?” He rasped out, his mouth and throat dry as a desert.

Speaking made him cough and that made him ache only for Anakin to draw the pain away with the Force, the blond using the hand on his cheek as a focus point. “A while ago. Its alright though.” Anakin murmured, raising the head of the bed with the controls until Obi-Wan’s head was raised up enough that he wouldn’t choke if he drank.

He put a cup with a small spout to Obi-Wan’s lips and despite the water being lukewarm, it was one of the best things Obi-Wan could remember drinking in a long while.

All the while, Anakin kept Obi-Wan’s hand on his cheek with his own flesh hand, using the mech hand to hold the cup.

A part of Obi-Wan suspected the other was monitoring him, the major part was just grateful for the touch, gentle as it was.

The cup finally empty, Anakin sat it aside, leaving the two staring at each other again.

Slowly, Obi-Wan glanced down towards his stomach, staring at the slight bulge before looking at Anakin again as the grip on his hand tightened slightly. “I… its gone… isn’t it?” He whispered, almost completely depleted for emotions as Anakin gave a slow, hesitant nod.

Not quite blank, certainly not serene but just as if he was a cloth that had been washed out of most of its colors.

Maybe it was the drugs that were doing it or just how emotional everything had been lately but Obi-Wan Kenobi was tired and the loss of the fetus was maybe the straw that broke the taun-taun’s back.

And somehow, that was worse.

It had been a fetus, a baby.

Blameless, guiltless.

Unwanted but a life nonetheless and yet Obi-Wan couldn’t even manage to summon sadness at its passing.

Hell, he even felt a small measure relief and Obi-Wan let out a small noise of denial as the emotion registered fully to him.

Wasn’t he suppose to feel sorrow, maybe some form for guilt?

It had been a baby.

Was Obi-Wan really that monster- warm arms wrapped around him, the scent of Anakin’s preferred if faded cologne reaching him along with the undertone of body sweat blotting out the grisly thoughts Obi-Wan was harboring.

Faintly, he could also hear the heart rate monitor, its beeping fast but slowing down as Anakin held onto him as tightly as the blond could in the awkward position, Anakin trying to avoid jostling Obi-Wan as best he could.

Obi-Wan had been panicking, his breathing speeding up along with his heart rate as he was slipping quickly towards a panic attack. And Anakin, realizing what was happening, had stepped in, cutting off the incoming panic attack that would do Obi-Wan no favor in his current condition.

He felt the mech hand slide under his head, cupping it as Anakin drew his head up against his shoulder and neck. “No one blames you,” Anakin whispered quietly, rubbing lightly as he held on.

“I-It wasn’t at fault though, it was a life and now its gone. But I don’t feel anything.” Obi-Wan whispered shakily, shaky hands as he clung to Anakin’s tunic.

He felt monstrous as he admitted that, how could Anakin stand to touch him, let alone hug him as kindly as he was.

What else could Obi-Wan be than a monster?

“Human,” Anakin whispered and Obi-Wan whined as he realized he must be broadcasting, his shields in pandemonium in his current condition. “It makes you human Obi-Wan, a very human, very complex person.” Anakin continued, still stroking his head.

“If this is to be human, I-I’m not sure I like it Anakin.” Obi-Wan hiccuped, pressing his face to the darkness of Anakin’s shoulder.

A faint, humorless laugh escaped the other at that and Obi-Wan could feel Anakin tighten the hug. “No one really likes it Obi-Wan,” He pressed a kiss to Obi-Wan’s forehead, the touch a comfort that Obi-Wan wasn’t sure he deserved. “But…” Anakin hesitated, his mech fingers rubbing through Obi-Wan’s hair. “If we’re human together, maybe that makes it a little easier?”

Too tired to cry, too tired to laugh Obi-Wan only let out a small noise as he clung to Anakin. “Maybe. Maybe being human together makes it a bit easier,” He quietly agreed. “As long as you’re here, maybe being human isn’t so bad.”

He wasn’t entirely sure of that but if Anakin was with him, perhaps Obi-Wan could at least exist.

If Anakin still wanted him around, if he was willing to hold his old master as tightly and protectively as he was, perhaps Obi-Wan wasn’t so abominable after all?

And maybe, once he had rested and wasn’t all numb, Obi-Wan might possibly believe such a thing.

Hi there! Hope your quarantine is going ok 🥰. I just binge read Sweethoney, and I was wondering if you could write more? Anything you want

Posted on av swmoddy

Having a mate could be hard sometimes, after all, you were two different people and had different opinions as Jango and Obi-Wan had already experienced.

They had their share of fights and compromises and boundaries had to be put into effect all the time.

Jango had to know when he had to step back and let his mate be a Jedi and Obi-Wan had to know when to step back and let Jango be a bounty hunter. And both had to understand that they couldn’t step on each others toes when it came to their respective ‘children’ so to speak. Anakin wasn’t a child anymore but it still applied to him just as it did to Boba.

That could cause friction of course, with both Obi-Wan and Jango being strong willed and opinionated people.

It wasn’t easy to make such a relationship between such people work always.

However, it could also be beautiful to have a mate like that.

Cracking open the can of beer he had been given, Jango glanced up at his mate uncertainly. “Are you sure you’re fine with me drinking?” He questioned seriously.

They had this discussion before, when Obi-Wan first became his mate.

The only stipulation Obi-Wan had back then was that they weren’t to become drunk in front of Boba and frankly, that was something Jango agreed with.

He didn’t want Boba to see him acting peculiar or see his father drop dead drunk. He wanted his pup to have a good role model for drinking and only occasionally had something to drink, maybe a glass of wine with dinner or a bottle of ale.

The occasional whiskey for a celebratory purpose.

And if he was honest, he wanted to support his mate too, he knew that Obi-Wan enjoyed a fine vintage and the occasional drink too. But pregnancy didn’t allow for that, a fetus didn’t ask for the amount of alcohol.

It could take damage from one drink, never mind several. So yes, Jango had wanted to support the other and had intended to go on the wagon so to speak, not drinking as long as Obi-Wan was carrying.

So, Obi-Wan handing him a cold one out of nowhere was a surprise even if Jango appreciated it.

It was especially surprising since Boba was right there, furiously working on his homework that his teachers had given him as he sat on the floor with the work on the caff table, a book propped up against a pitcher of peach tea Obi-Wan had made for the boy.

Rolling his eyes, Obi-Wan carefully sat down against him on the squishy leather couch. “Jango, if I wasn’t fine with you drinking some alcohol, I wouldn’t get one for you.” He stated solemnly, nuzzling into the mandalorian’s shoulder with a small smile.

Sipping, Jango eyed him before humming slightly and settling back against the couch, sliding his arm around the others shoulders. Instantly, Obi-Wan made himself comfortable against Jango’s chest with a content little huff, rubbing his cheek to Jango’s collarbone.

Taking another sip, Jango noted that the can was condensing against the heat of his hand. ‘Can’t put it on the table without a coaster, would ruin the wood.’ He inwardly sighed. He’d hate to leave behind water damage on Obi-Wan’s nice, polished dark wood table.

Not that he was going to complain.

Hell, he had a cold beer in hand, brought to him by a mate that was being cuddly and was relaxing with said mate all but clinging to him.

And then Obi-Wan all but climbed into his lap, throwing his legs up over Jango’s knee to press into his side and chest even more.

Chuckling softly, Jango rubbed his cheek against the top of the others head. “Cuddly mate.” He whispered fondly, ignoring Boba rolling his eyes at them as he turned the page of his pad book.

“Mhmm, I am. So give me all the cuddles and I might give you a back rub before bed.” Obi-Wan teased playfully.

Having a mate could be beautiful and Jango wouldn’t trade his life for anything.

Hey! I am absolutely in love with your writing and I discovered «Hoarder Seer» and it is sooooo good! *-* I am so happy Obi-Wan and his children are alive! Any chance we get to see what happens next? Like maybe him recovering from the attack and Cody by his side helping him get back on his feet?

Posted on av swmoddy

Leaning against the wall, Cody let out a soft hum. “Are you sure you’re alright cyare?” He questioned quietly as he peered around the doorway and into the open fresher.

Letting out a low chuckle of amusement, Obi-Wan sent the other a small smile as he sat on the toilet, the position easier for him due to the pelvic pain he was having than to stand and pee. “Yes Cody, if I need help, I’ll ask you but I am as good as done.” He stated fondly, chuckling more when Cody’s ears turned red and he went back to staring at the door to his room.

Since Obi-Wan was still so weak after the explosion, Cody hadn’t felt comfortable with him going to the fresher with the door closed, just in case he fell over or overbalanced in his weakened condition.

But a the same time, he also didn’t want anyone seeing Obi-Wan in his current position, which lead to this compromise of Cody guarding the doors.

Honestly, Obi-Wan half wanted Qui-Gon to come through the door and see how Cody reacted to the older master or maybe even a nurse, cause frankly?

Cody’s reaction would be hilarious.

‘Not that people could see much except for my legs, seeing as I just pulled up my medical gown and my underwear is on my knees.’ Obi-Wan mused to himself, shaking himself before awkwardly getting to his feet by gripping the sink beside the toilet, the heavy swell of his belly making things hard as usual.

Not that he was about to complain but honestly, at this point he’d welcome the kids for the sole reason that moving around would be easier.

Hearing him move around, Cody instantly turned to him, awkwardly twisting his hands together as he stared at Obi-Wan.

Blinking back, Obi-Wan struggled to pull his underwear up before letting out a huff and giving the other an imploring stare. “Cody… could you help me?” Obi-Wan sighed, blinking again when relief echoed in Cody’s eyes.

‘Oh… he wanted to help.’ Obi-Wan flushed a bit as Cody stepped in and pulled up Obi-Wan’s underwear, carefully pulling it up around the swell as he ignored the blaster strapped to Obi-Wan’s inner thigh, offering his arm after with a small smile, eager to get Obi-Wan back to bed.

That just made Obi-Wan smile as he shuffled around the sink instead. “Wash my hands first and then you can help me back to bed love.” He stated calmly, trying not to giggle when Cody made a slightly embarrassed noise of realization.

“Right, hand wash… sorry.” Cody laughed slightly, watching Obi-Wan with a soft, endearing look on his face, his image reflected in the mirror.

It made Obi-Wan’s heart thump with softness as he washed his hands on auto while watching Cody’s face, the softness of the others eyes and the love obvious in his smile. Sometimes he wondered if he deserved it, other times he could just feel happy that he had somehow gained it.

Finally, done in the fresher, he let Cody direct him back into bed, wobbling faintly as he leaned heavily on the other. “Thank you Cody.” He whispered.

“Of course Obi-Wan, you don’t have to thank me for helping you.” Cody scolded quietly, helping him into bed and tucking the covers around him, fussing over him.

‘I don’t mean for that but I think its better if I don’t explain myself,’ He smiled at the other. ‘Thank you for loving me Cody, thank you for not belittling my hoarder skill, I know its something those outside of the Force has a hard time understanding, thank you for being you. Just… thank you Cody, my dearest Cody. Thank you for our children.’ Obi-Wan settled back into the bed, breathing out.

Then he laughed softly as Cody sat on his bedside to hold his hand, rubbing it between his own.

Cody was just endearing, he couldn’t help but adore the other man and he settled down into the pillows the other had fluffed up for him when Obi-Wan got up to go to the loo. “I swear you spoil me.” He noted lovingly, smiling at him.

“Anything for you cyare, you’re my heart and soul.” Cody whispered, lifting the others hands to his lips.

Flushing, Obi-Wan wondered if anyone would blame him for being utterly captivated by his commander… and then he decided he didn’t care at all as he pulled the other down into a soft kiss with a tug on Cody’s hands. So what if Cody had him utterly charmed?

Jedi were fully allowed to love as long as they didn’t let themselves be consumed by it and while Obi-Wan would give his own life for Cody… well, he knew that Cody wouldn’t want it.

Cody respected that Obi-Wan was a Jedi, that he had a duty.

And that was part of Cody’s charm.

Obi-Wan was the luckiest man in the entire galaxy for gaining Cody’s love.

He only pulled away from the soft kiss when the door hissed open, both turning their heads to find a nurse coming in, the twi’lek smiling warmly at them with a tray in his hands. “Master Jedi, commander, lunch time.” He cheerfully announced, lifting the covered tray.

Despite how bright and happy the nurse was, Obi-Wan felt a sudden unease trickle down his spine as he stared at the tray.

In secret we carry, is the baby okay?!

Posted on av swmoddy

The bridge of the Negotiator was full of people and yet no one spoke, laughed or joked, the troopers all focused on their tasks with a gloomy atmosphere leaving them all with the reluctance to break the silence.

Not that it was fully silent, considering all the machines working or the squeak of boots on durasteel floor, that be impossible.

But no one was making more noise than they could avoid and no one was speaking.

All of them were too consumed with the knowledge of what had happened to their General.

And no one was more effected than Commander Cody, the man standing silent as a statue with his arms crossed over his chest.

Several sent worried glances at their vod but knew better than to disturb him, Cody didn’t deal well with emotional turmoil, it made him snappish and therefore they left him be until he was ready to speak to someone.

And right now, every last living person on the Negotiator was severely emotionally compromised.

The General had miscarried on their way to Kuat, the loss of blood and the pain he had gone through setting his recovery back by weeks.

A pale and bleak Helix had come to the bridge to inform them only hours ago, blood on the back of his hand that Waxer had quietly cleaned. Helix had stared at his hand in horror even after the blood had been cleaned off his dark skin, as if he could still see it and when Waxer had noticed there was blood under Helix nails, he had quietly requested some leave to help the poor man.

What else could Cody say than yes, especially after learning that General Skywalker was sitting with Obi-Wan, observing him and keeping an eye.

When Helix looked like a stiff breeze could tip him over end, his eyes too wide and haunted, looking more like a shiny that had lost their entire batch on the first battle?

No, Cody wasn’t that heartless and Waxer was the best choice for someone when they needed care, Waxer was naturally nurturing and gentle, it was one of the reasons Numa had become so attached to him after all.

Hemolytic disease Helix had said while standing there in a shock as Waxer cleaned his hands, that the General’s baby had a different blood type than the General, something about Rh factors and plus and minus blood. It went over Cody’s head if he was honest but he had listened while Helix had spoken in slurred words.

The explanation hadn’t been good enough for Cody to really understand.

What he did know was that due to different blood, the baby didn’t make it, the General miscarried.

Cody wasn’t sure what to feel about any of it.

Because he knew his General.

One one hand, it made everything easier, nature had taken its own decision.

But on the other hand, it took the decision out of Obi-Wan’s hands.

After everything that had happened, that was what had been so important, it was why the high council had agreed to send the General away to Kuat, Cody knew that from General Skywalker, that the council was considering Obi-Wan’s recovery, not just the physical but the mental as well.

And now it was out of his hands.

Cody wasn’t sure what Obi-Wan would have decided, he liked to say that he knew his General well but a decision like this?

No, Cody wasn’t sure what Obi-Wan would have in the end decided, to keep it or not.

Now it didn’t matter.

What mattered now was what had happened and what they were going to do about it.

Because the end result was this, Obi-Wan was still going through all the traumatic osik that had happened… but this time he wouldn’t be alone.

Cody had been angry before, he had been hurt and it had backfired.

He was allowed to be hurt and angry but he couldn’t leave the General alone to cope in all of his misery. Because in the end, it would drown the poor man and Cody… Cody had already had a taste of what things would be like if Obi-Wan was gone.

He couldn’t handle that again.

If he was to loose his General, he’d go down with him this time.

That wasn’t a healthy mindset, Cody knew that, but he knew he wasn’t the only trooper that thought that way, many vode with Jedi commanders would rather die than watch the Jedi die.

A clone didn’t have many rights, many possessions and to have a Jedi General… to be listened to and to have them look at you like you really were a person when others thought you were just useless cannon fodder, a flesh droid… well, it was what made the troopers cling so tightly to their Jedi.

Being left behind by the person that listened to them, that believed in them and cared for them…

There was nothing worse and Cody couldn’t handle going through that again, especially not if he was to receive the pitying glances from other commanders.

It was one of the reasons he had reacted so coldly to the news that Obi-Wan was alive, to see the pity of others and go through the grief as he had only to know that Obi-Wan had been alive the entire time?

That he had willingly put Cody through that sense of loss?

Well, a bad reaction.

A bad decision, despite remaining professional.

Cody’s mistake.

He’d correct it now and sooth the hurt he had caused because Cody knew that Obi-Wan would need them now and… and he so badly wanted to be there for him as long as Obi-Wan allowed it.

‘When he wakes up… I’ll go to him. I’ll apologize… and I’ll be there.’ Cody breathed out heavily, grateful for his helmet covering his expression as he finally came to a decision.

Anakin talks to Obi in the secrets we carry. It goes… well it goes.

Posted on av swmoddy

Resisting the urge to ask Helix or a painkiller for his hips and maybe an analgesic patch for his headache, Obi-Wan stared at his former padawan as Anakin continued fiddling with the blanket instead of looking at him.

Honestly, he was uncertain why Anakin was here if he was honest, he knew that the ship was in motion, the Negotiator on its way through hyperlanes from what he could tell, which meant that his request to not be on Coruscant had been granted.

But why Anakin was there…

Or maybe that was Obi-Wan being unkind, he knew that the other was here because he had spoken to the council and most likely had information for Obi-Wan, concrete information where they were going but… well, Obi-Wan was so tired after the harshness these last months. If Anakin was still behaving that way…

He didn’t know if he could handle it right now, not after all of Helix’s kindness.

Though Helix was hovering in his office door, watching closely even if he wasn’t close enough to hear and his protectiveness was practically overwhelming any other feeling in the Force.

Not that Anakin was pushing anything into the Force, his shields were currently durasteel tight and only his body language betrayed anything, the other clearly feeling nervous from how he was behaving.

“I… I spoke with the council,” Anakin finally said, glancing up quickly and then down again, too brief for Obi-Wan to read much from him outside of the nervous squirming. But at least that was better than anger Obi-Wan guessed. “We’re currently on our way to Kuat, ostentatiously to scout and gather information but its at the moment one of the safer regions.” Anakin stated quietly.

Discreetly shifting, trying to ease the pain in his hips and back, Obi-Wan let out a low noise of understanding. “For how long?” He inquired, licking his dry lips.

“Two months, the council wants you…” Anakin hesitated, finally looking up, his eyes wide and youthful looking. “They want you to make a decision by two months.” He whispered meekly.

And in that moment Obi-Wan, meeting Anakin’s eyes, he could read him.

Shame. Anakin was ashamed.

“Anakin?” He whispered, reaching out to touch the top of the others flesh hand.

Anakin trembled, looking like he was expecting to be struck, an expression Obi-Wan hadn’t seen on the others face in years, not since that first year he had the former slave child become his padawan.

“Anakin wha-” Obi-Wan squeaked as the other snatched Obi-Wan’s hand between his, hiccuping harshly as he pulled Obi-Wan’s hand up to press it to his face.

“I left you alone,” He rasped out, sounding like he was dragging the words out of his soul. “You were hurting, you were isolated and I left you alone. I was so angry that I thought you deserved to pay but I didn’t know that… you were hurting.” He choked out, clinging almost painfully to Obi-Wan’s skinny hand.

Clicking his tongue, Obi-Wan rested his free hand on Anakin’s head. “Anakin, I…” He trailed off, uncertain what to even say.

He couldn’t say that the other was blameless but he wasn’t alone to blame.

And Obi-Wan had indeed needed Anakin, his best friend and brother.

“You were hurting and I knew it and still… I was being petty. I should have been happy you were alive and back instead I turned my back on you and now…” Anakin lifted his head enough to look at him again, eyes wide as tears rolled down his cheeks. “You’re hurting even more than I knew… and I don’t know how to help you now that I know and I’m scared I’ll hurt you again and make it worse and I just don’t know what to do.” He sniffled out.

Feeling his own eyes well up with tears, emotionally unstable as he was, Obi-Wan opened his mouth, closed it and then smiled shakily. “Help me by being here now? Please Anakin. I really can’t do this alone. I don’t know what I’m going to decide but please Anakin… don’t leave me again?” He requested, voice breaking.

Obi-Wan and Anakin were the team and he honestly didn’t think he could handle it if the other kept rejecting him, he knew that he was depressed from before but he worried how far that depression would go if Anakin kept rejecting him.

Nodding hurriedly, Anakin trembled as more tears continued to roll down his face without him bothering to reach up to dry them, still clinging to Obi-Wan’s hand as the redhead let out a soft, hiccuping laugh while reaching down to try and dry the tears. “C-Can I hug you? Please?” Anakin requested hopefully, voice shaking.

That caused Obi-Wan to let out a new, harsher sob that shook him, made pain echo through him even as his stomach cramped at the shake. “Please.” He agreed, nodding, laughing shakily when Anakin shot to his feet.

The others arm wrapped around him tightly, jarring Obi-Wan on the bed and Force, it hurt to be shifted about forcibly but Obi-Wan wasn’t about to complain at the first hug in two months that he had gotten from his former padawan.

No, he was going to enjoy this for as long as it lasted as he pressed his face to Anakin’s collarbone, letting out a muffled sob.

Emotions were so difficult to handle right now and Anakin willingly touching him, something Obi-Wan had been missing for so long.

To finally have it back…

He had been so scared that he had lost Anakin for good for doing his duties.

But here he was, holding Obi-Wan, his hand slowly rubbing up and down his spine, seemingly forgiving Obi-Wan for the pain he had caused him.

And yet, Obi-Wan’s happiness did not last long as a sudden cramp had him crying out with pain, Anakin yelping and pulling back to hold his shoulders Obi-Wan doubled over and wrapped his arms around his burning stomach, pain radiating through his entire body. “Obi-Wan!?”

Helix practically materialized by their side, tools dumped on the bed beside him. “Sir!?” He reached out, touching Obi-Wan’s stomach only to have the Jedi outright scream at the touch due to the agony it caused. “Where does it hurt?”

Gasping, Obi-Wan tried to answer, his vision darkening slightly as he was guided to lay down, the pain doubling as he did and faintly he could feel a warm wetness spreading around his hips.

And then he knew no more.

SecretWeCarry was stunning. I squeaked when the sheer EMOTION passing around that room became obvious guilt and horror. I was super touched by how determined Fox was not to cross General Kenobi’s boundaries (as much as he could, anyway, given what the men under his command had done). The way that Cody’s news dropped like a stone into a pond was amazing. I am eager for the various Troopers’ reactions! I can’t wait to see what happens as (or if, dependign on Obi-Wan) this becomes more known!

Posted on av swmoddy

Pressing the cup of caff into Cody’s hands, Rex gave him a wry smile as the other managed to twitch his lips for him.

Not that Rex expected a giant grin from the vod with red-rimmed eyes honestly.

When he had arrived, Cody had been sitting on the floor with Bly rubbing his back and Fox at the door, clearly guarding and sending any other vode packing with a quick glare as he held a tissue to his nose. Cody had been silently crying into his own legs, letting go of all the emotions he had pent up in a safe space where those he was suppose to lead didn’t see him and he wouldn’t disturb his General.

Not that Obi-Wan would see it that way but Rex knew how Cody thought, Cody didn’t want Obi-Wan to see him right now, Cody wanted Obi-Wan to sleep and relax and take care of himself.

So he cried silent tears as all vode had learned to cry, lest the longnecks saw them, breaking down in the company of other vode high up in command.

Finally letting himself shatter.

Which left Rex to take care of his vod along with his other vode.

Which was why he had chucked his armor at Wolffe and gotten on his knees, hugging his brother as tightly as he could. He’d let Cody bury his face in his chest instead of his own legs, had worked Cody’s armor off enough to rub his back, to murmur quiet words.

Eventually, what felt like an hour or two later but was in reality forty minutes, Cody had finally calmed down enough to move onto one of the couches, sitting listlessly with his elbows on his knees, face flushed and his eyes swollen.

Wolffe had the caff done by then and had already prepared a cup he had passed to Rex and Rex to Cody, the former sitting between the latter’s knees.

“…I’m not sorry for punching you.” Cody mumbled, his voice raw even as he continued sipping his caff.

Rex blinked only to let out an understanding noise as Cody glanced at Fox.

So THAT was what had happened.

Well, that explained the blood and all.

‘Should have figured he’d do that…’ Rex thought to himself, even as Fox grunted at him.

“I already disciplined the guards responsible for the… the lapse of security.” Fox floundered a bit, clearly uncertain what to call it all.

And since the door was open, he wasn’t going to say what had happened.

Rex could appreciated that, the other not wanting to broadcast General Kenobi’s experience.

The vode would eventually learn.

The entire GAR vode were too tightly entwined and connected for the secret to last once it was made public that the General was pregnant.

Eventually someone would make connections due to dates and from there lips would spread the information.

But it wouldn’t be from Fox.

Cody took another sip of hot caff, nodding before turning his reddened eyes to Rex. “I… thought you were with General Skywalker?” He questioned, his voice still slightly raw slightly but the liquids helping him.

“I was,” Rex agreed quietly, pushing encouragingly at the cup with the back of his hand. Cody huffed but took another sip, watching him still. “General Skywalker went to the temple to speak to the high Generals, he didn’t need me.” There was an unsaid ‘you did.’ that had Cody glancing away, his shoulders tense.

Rex didn’t let that get to him, only kept watching Cody, keeping him company. It was Wolffe that broke the second, less comfortable silence with an uncomfortable question. “So what happens now?” He grunted, rolling his eye when both Rex and Cody looked at him. “There’s no way General Kenobi can fight in his… condition,” Both Rex and Cody flinched. “So what happens now?” He crossed his arms over his chest.

Rex and Cody exchanged glances, the latter looking a bit helpless.

Rex finally sighed, deciding the others deserved an answer since they knew about the situation. He rubbed at the back of his neck before looking to Wolffe. “General Skywalker is with the High Generals to figure that out. General Kenobi hasn’t left the Negotiator, doesn’t want to come down to Coruscant and the temple at all. If I were to take a guess, I think General Skywalker will petition the Jedi council to ship them somewhere for General Kenobi’s health.” He settled on.

Cody nodded, agreeing with Rex, eyes tiredly finding Wolffe again.

Bly, Wolffe and Fox exchanged looks before nodding.

“Beside,” Rex continued, his lips twitching a bit as everyone looked at him. “If anyone as much as looks at General Kenobi wrong right now, Helix goes a bit rabid. He’s stalking the medbay of the Negotiator like a great akk hound, so Skywalker has the medic on his side in this.” He chuckled slightly.

Cody gave a snort. “Helix will stab the first person that upsets the General right now. Not that I blame him.” He stated wryly, letting Rex distract everyone.

“… Medics are kinda scary.” Fox mused to himself by the door, Wolffe, Bly, Rex and Cody all snorting in agreement.

“Try and escape the medbay of the Resolute, I’ve seen Kix body tackle vode that attempted it and nerve pinch them.” Rex stated dryly before launching into the story of the time Hevy tried to run out of the medbay after apparently getting a very peculiar ‘rash’ near his intimate zone. Kix had full out body tackled him near the mess hall, everyone able to see as Kix slammed the vod down, crawled up his body, pinched his neck.

Kix had then given the closest vod in the mess hall a gimlet look and then stood, ‘casually’ brushing off himself before grabbing Hevy by his left foot and dragging him back towards the medbay.

It was a lesson every 501st had taken to heart.

Don’t run from Kix, if its on the Resolute, he will hunt you down.

Just wanted to drop in an say how much I’m loving the angst of Secretwecarry! I gotta wonder, how that meeting between Cody and Fox is gonna go down? Like, this horrible thing happened on Fox’s watch, even if it’s not what those guards ‘meant’ to happen, and they thought it was Hardeen who it happened to. How are they gonna feel when they learn it was General Kenobi?

Posted on av swmoddy

Touching his nose gingerly as he laid on the floor of the rec room, Fox almost let out a noise of relief when he found it wasn’t broken, simply bleeding but thought better of it as he still had a raging vod’ika looming over him.

Hell, Fox had been expecting this for months frankly, ever since the news that Kenobi had been Hardeen undercover came out and had been shocked when the first few weeks had passed by without a raging Cody coming after him after what happened to his General.

Now hadn’t that been a fun little bit of news for Fox, considering he knew exactly what had happened at the prison, the medical officers at Maw prison being by law forced to inform Fox as their commander.

It had been a spot on Fox record before, to have such an event happen in one of his prisons, to have his underlings and fellow Coruscant Guard behave in such a way.

But to later learn it happen to a Jedi undercover…

Well, sufficient to say, Fox had been expecting Cody for quite some time now, it was only a matter of time before the other found out after all and maybe it had been the cowards way, but Fox hadn’t wanted to be the one to inform him.

And maybe it was also a nod of respect to the Jedi, that Kenobi should be the one to choose to inform someone, even his own commander, by choice.

Settling his bloody hand down on the floor, Fox decided it was better to remain down as Cody continued to glare down at him. “Commander Cody.” He settled on, his voice thick as he noticed Bly and Wolffe hovering not far from them, ready to intervene should things get uglier.

Hell, Fox wasn’t sure the two would have intervened the initial punch but it was nice to know that they were ready to prevent a further shuffle.

“Don’t you commander Cody me,” The other hissed, raising his quivering fist though showing no other sign of attacking again. “Do you have any idea what your men has allowed?!” Cody continued to hiss at him.

Rubbing his jaw lightly, Fox eyed him speculatively before nodding. “Course I do. Medical was forced to inform me.” He stated seriously, almost snorting when Cody seemed to loose all steam.

He resisted, to spare his poor nose the pain.

“You knew?” Cody balked, staring at him. “You knew and you didn’t tell me?”

Frowning, Fox cautiously scooted back on his elbows and then slowly got up, staring at his fellow commander. “Like I said, Medical was forced to inform me and later on the news cam-he didn’t tell you himself, did he?” Realization hit Fox heavily.

General Kenobi had not informed Cody.

If the other had been informed willingly, Cody wouldn’t be acting this incensed, be looking for a target to unleash his ire on this hard. Or be this shocked that Fox knew. “…Osik, he didn’t tell you anything about his undercover mission?” Fox gawked at the other, even as Cody pulled back, bristling with rage.

Thankfully, Wolffe chose that moment to step in, settling his hand on Cody’s shoulder. “Alright, deep breaths ori’vod. Deep breath and tell us what is going on?” He stated seriously.

Fox instantly stepped back again, lifting his hands. “Oh hell no, I’m not telling anyone what I know. That’s General Kenobi’s personal issues and I have more respect for him than to go around with loose lips.” He snapped, wincing as his nose throbbed.

At least Cody seemed to have deflated enough that Fox felt safe enough in cleaning his nose.

It made him wonder why Cody had found out now of all ti- “He’s pregnant.” Cody’s hollow voice echoed in the room.

Fox actually felt himself freeze, his body oddly hot and cold at the same time as he slowly focused his eyes on his slumping brother.

The General was pregnant.

Cody’s General, who had been raped in prison and contracted an STD, was pregnant.

Bly was cursing.

Goodie, two shoes Bly was cursing.

It might have been the shock of seeing the usually so mild but capable vod that had Fox focusing on the situation again, Wolffe still staring down at Cody with a wide eye, his artificial one not reacting properly.

“Why in Kamino’s storms are you telling us that?” Fox snapped out, reaching into his belt to pull out a tissue, dabbing at the blood from his nose. He continued when Cody opened his mouth. “You shouldn’t be telling us that, that’s your General, hell, you all have almost thrown me out windows when I’ve made as much as a despairing remark about any of your Generals!” Fox snapped, glaring all three of his vode.

The three exchanged looks before Bly slowly nodded. “Fox is right… Cody… what… what’s going on?” Bly questioned softly, stepping closer to gently rest his hand on Cody’s arm.

Opening his mouth, Cody floundered for a few moments before he shrugged. “I don’t know what to do.” He admitted in a tiny voice they hadn’t heard since their decanting and training days, when Cody was the youngest and was trying so hard despite his head being karking split open.

With that admittance, Cody collapsed down on his ass and pulled his legs to his chest, soundlessly rocking as Bly instantly followed him down and started rubbing at his armored back, whispering quiet, soothing words while Wolffe headed to the door, intent on hunting down Captain Rex clearly.

And Fox?

Fox set up guard in the doorway while pressing the tissue to his bleeding nose, recognizing that their vod needed time to compose himself and guarding his privacy as best they could.

And in the meantime, all three tried not to think about the fact that General Kenobi, the Negotiator himself, one of two leaders of the broken circle armada and one of the highest leading Generals of the entire GAR, was pregnant.